Life balance

Balance. The ultimate goal. Ricky Lankford


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Create the life you want

If I could tell you only one thing about how to be successful – it would be “start doing”. Whether you believe in your success or not, whether you know where you gonna end up or not – DOING is what matters.

I have been struggling to understand this concept for years. All successful people and life coaches, all “smart” quotes kept repeating : “you don’t have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step”; “Make a small step every day”;”Success is the doing, not the getting” etc

What on earth am I suppose to “DO” ? Where am I suppose to start and step on? Even if I had the picture of my perfect life – I’m gonna be rich and successful and respected. I will make big contribution to the world and people will appreciate and enjoy it. I will also be madly in love and be loved, I will have a lot of friends who adore and support me, I will ….- I had a lot of dreams but had no idea what can bring me to them.

So after years of researches, following countless blogs and lives of successful people – I’m finally starting to grasp the idea behind.

You don’t have to have spectacular idea, which all of a sudden will turn around your world and make you and everyone around happy. You don’t start making huge changes out of nothing. It’s like going to the gym – you don’t lift 50(60, 100) kg weights at once if you have never exercised before. You won’t make great world discoveries in mathematics or physics, if you haven’t learned how to count.

It’s absolutely the same with each aspect of your life. Whether it’s your career, love life or well-being in general -really, all you have to do is a small step forward, a decision to make something happen :  I’m going to change my life. I’m gonna wake up every morning charged, happy and excited about upcoming day. Because I love my perfect health, my outstanding beauty, my interesting job, my family, my friends, my car , my plants… Because I want this life and I deserve it.

Every single aspect of our life can be changed only if we decide to change it. After the decision  is taken we can set up some action plan – how I want it to look like and what am I going to do about it

My job doesn’t quite fit to my perfect vision. What am I gonna do about it? Why don’t I like it? Is it because I don’t bring enough value and contribution, or am I simply at the wrong job? Do I have to start pushing more at my current job, doing more than I am asked to, or should I change it? What it’s gonna be?

I don’t like my current relationships (or don’t have any). Why? Is it because I am too demanding, too depressive or negative towards other people? Is it because I’m afraid to attach? What can I change about my current situation? Do I have to end current lifeless relationships? Do I have to become a better person myself so I can attract more positive people?

What is happening with my health? Why I’m getting sick so often? What am I doing wrong? Am I eating bad food, have bad habits, don’t do sports, or maybe I’m speaking constantly about diseases, so they keep following me? What can I do about my current situation, finally get rid of that chronic cold, or learn to live with my situation if I cant change it?

Take a decision, question everything and make an action plan. I do that every day now. I finally understand the difference between “yeah, would be nice to have bunch of money, few cars, loving partner, house on the beach, …” and “I’m gonna live passionate, charged life, I will enjoy every moment of it, I will get everything I ever wanted because I deserve it”.

I can already see some small, but positive changes in my life. Job offers come along. Nice people appear here and there. I exercise every day and I love the way I look. I do not have any health issues. I can go on…

Our lives are fully in our hands, even if we don’t admit it. Let’s start building it properly 🙂


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List of my favorite life coaches

I have been researching area of self-growth and development for quite a long time now. I went trough thousands articles, hundreds authors and blogs. Some I’ve rejected immediately, from some I liked few articles only. All of them though, to different extend, made positive effect on my life, and I am glad to share the list of biggest contributors.

Here is my top7 chart:

  1. Kelsey Aida – my number ONE life guide. Huge number of blog entries about manifesting good stuff into your life. She is so positive, full of energy and love, that you just want to stay around her blog for a little more…
  2. Marie Forleo – famous world-class life coach. She speaks mainly about creating business of your dream, but you can apply her advice to any other aspect of your life
  3. BoldSelf – Chiara Mazzucco’s blog is mainly about making changes in your personality – become confident, assertive person, the one you always wanted to be
  4. re-self – my most stable life coach. I ‘ve been researching and changing places for inspiration all the time, but Olesya stays with me for years now. If you are ready to read the tough truth about yourself – its definitely place to go. Her main website is in Russian language, however, they recently started to translate it to English.
  5. TheUnlost – my career guide. It does really help! The author opens your eyes on some common life misconceptions. You suddenly realize that it’s okay to be who and where you are, but if you want to – you can move forward.
  6. Brendon Burchard – recent discovery. The guy is just amazing. He is smiling, and speaks simple and is so excited about the things he talks, that you don’t have a choice but to get excited too!
  7. A Home for Multipotentialites – also my very recent discovery. Although I did not stay there for long, but I think that the idea they convey is quite interesting – how to combine all of your skills, talents and passions into one business. Might be helpful for someone.

That will be all for now 🙂


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How and why I started running

I ve been thinking to start running for years.. I ve made several unsuccessful attempts, but always gave up after 1-3 tries, each 4-5 minutes long. At some point I decided that Im just not a sport person, and I was OK with it for a long time.

This year many things have changed in my life. I changed work, ended relationships which meant a lot to me, I started driving school and i finally started running.

Inspiration came from a sport-maniac friend, but unlike all the other times – it stayed with me until now and turned to be part of my life. Why? What was different from all the other attempts in previous years?

Well, first of all, I had really good examples between my friends. I was hearing here and there how they do it, how they participate in massive runs or marathons, and mainly – how they enjoy it. Of course, they also tried to drag me into it. My first reaction was – me? running? or doing anything else except sitting on the couch or chair in the pub? NO WAY. Thats just not me, not my lifestyle, you know, Im not an active person,…. and many other important reasons. But under continuous stories about how cool sport is,  these excuses slowly turned into “maybe I should try”.

Meanwhile, being really not an active person, I started to realize how tired, exhausted i feel every day, the energy I had was just enough to come to work and to somehow get trough the day, and then go home, watch a movie or go to pub. I started to be chronically tired, i was breathing heavily after few seconds of run when catching the bus, I had a feeling Im falling apart.

Thoughts about doing some sport became stronger. I was not aiming for doing something professionally, but I started to realize that if i dont do something with my body now – it will be harder and harder with every year.

Of course I decided to try running – Its free, you can start anytime, its outdoor, and everyone is speaking about it. However my brain was still not ready and resisting a change, so it was postponed few times with “I have no running shoes, neither clothes”, or “cmon, the weather is terrible, I cant go run in rain or cold”…

One April day I came home, had nothing planned with friends, I was bored. The weather was amazing – warm and with fresh, pleasant wind. It was pity to stay home, so I just put on “not running” sport shoes and “not running” sport clothes and went outside.

I have run 3 minutes that day. These 3 minutes were probably the longest ever. I couldn’t breathe and I was exhausted and was thinking how the hell people do hours and even enjoy it… I barely finished my 3 minutes. Got some air, walked a bit and relaxed. And then, the huge wave of pride and satisfaction hit me.  I did it!!!  Happiness comes with the result. I moved my ass after months, no, years of immobility. Its not a lot, but it meant soo much to me!! I knew it was just a beginning.

And so it was. I went running again the day after. And then again. Then I bought RUNNING shoes. Amazing light running shoes, which were helping me to get motivated. I look so cool in them! I have to go running just to put this cool shoes on..

Ive chosen comfortable time –  evening after work, as even small hint of waking up at 6am just to run was giving me chill and immediate denial.

I started running regularly and improving every day. I went running even in rain, or when i was not feeling well. NOT RUNNING WAS NOT AN OPTION anymore. I train not only when I feel good and in the mood. I train no matter what, and I always feel better after.  At first I was running twice per week, then 3 times,then i tried to do it every day, I was adjusting and adjusting, modifying according to my schedules and my other plans. Now I run 3-4 times per week and adjusting my other plans according to running schedule 🙂

Since april I have improved a lot. I bought my first tracker – garmin forerunner. Tracking your records motivates even more. You always want to do better than previous time! Now Im running 5km , 30 mins – far from marathon, but this is my first significant achievement , and I can already see improvements in my health. I have more energy, feel more strong, im less nervous and worried, I sleep better and generally feel happier and more satisfied with my life.

I will participate in 5km rainbow run (where part of money goes for kids who have oncology diseases) in 2 weeks from now. My “non-sporty” friends start asking questions – Why would you run just to give some money to some charity if you can just give those money? Well. half year back all these runs didnt make sense to me neither. Now it is all clear: we run, because we love running. Doing this with huge amount of people – its a lot of fun and positive energy. Doing this to help other people  – gives purpose and even more satisfaction from the things we do.

Dont think that running became a toy for me, and its light and easy. Its not.. I struggle and suffer each time. First 15 minutes are now enjoyable – but only if Im in good shape that day. But the next 15 are just suffering. I want to stop and give up and generally – remind me why am I doing it?? but  I push trough, I talk to myself – I made it last time, and several times before – I can do it again! Look, this 70-years old grandpa is running, and I cant?? Im young and full of energy, of course I can!

And I make my 5km every time no matter what. And I know that I will do more. The feelings I have after are just not describable. I feel accomplished. i feel that i can do everything I want. I am more confident in myself. Im improving both mind and body, and there can’t be greater reward. This will pay me off big time.

We are where we are only because we are OK with that. Only when we stop being OK – we start to change.

I will finish this article and go put my shoes on – its hot in here these days, so i go running only after sun is down.

Good luck to everyone who is starting the same track!